I’m not a fan of goodbyes. People keep asking me if I’m excited about leaving. It’s not so much that I’m excited about leaving this fantastic place and all the lovely people in it, but I’m definitely excited about where I’m headed. Asia beckons.
These last few months in Colorado have been filled with cherished moments of heightened awareness. Every conversation, every cheesy joke, every impromptu gathering with friends…it all has felt so real. I don’t know if I’ve ever been so present and thankful for what’s going on around me, knowing that my time here is limited.
I keep thinking of this idea of a Band-Aid. It’s a thing of comfort and protection that, when removed, can hurt like heck. Do you peel it away slowly and prolong the pain? Or do you rip it off with one intense pull? Either way, you feel it.
Perhaps I’ve done a little of both in the goodbye process. The fact that I’m leaving hits me at different times in different ways, but I’ve still tried to invest and engage fully with those around me (the slow peel). And regardless of my efforts to prepare mentally, I sense that packing everything into the car and driving off will feel like a dramatic rip as I see the landscape disappear behind me. This landscape will undoubtably be very different two-and-a-half years from now.
So there you have it, beauty mixed with pain. Sweet moments peppered with a knowledge of the change to come. But it’s a hopeful change. One that I know is right and good. Father willing, after some adventure, adversity and growth, I intend to return to this place. In which case, it’s not a “goodbye,” but rather, “until we meet again”…:-)